Aubrey Plaza Compares Grief to an ‘Ocean of Awfulness’

In a heartfelt conversation, actress Aubrey Plaza has shared her experience with grief following the tragic death of her husband, director and screenwriter Jeff Baena. Speaking on a podcast, Plaza offered an honest look into her daily life since Baena’s passing in January, describing it as a difficult and ongoing struggle.

Navigating the Daily Struggle

Aubrey Plaza, known for her unique comedic style and deadpan delivery, opened up to her friend Amy Poehler about the reality of grieving. When asked how she was doing, Plaza acknowledged the difficulty, stating, “It’s a daily struggle, obviously.” This candidness resonated with many, as it provided a rare and vulnerable glimpse into her personal life.

The actress expressed that while she is “functioning” and “grateful to be moving through the world,” the pain of her loss is a constant presence. Her comments highlight that grief is not a linear process and that even a period of feeling okay can exist alongside intense sorrow.

A Powerful Analogy

To help describe her emotions, Plaza used a powerful and unique analogy, comparing her grief to a scene from the 2025 movie The Gorge. She described a landscape with two cliffs separated by a deep, dark gorge filled with “monster people.”

Plaza explained that she feels like she’s always on the edge of that cliff, with the “ocean of awfulness” always in view. Sometimes she wants to dive into it, other times she just looks at it, and other times she tries to get away from it. This analogy provides a powerful visual for the complex, ever-present nature of grief, where feelings of sadness and overwhelming pain are always lurking just beneath the surface.

Remembering a Creative Partnership

Aubrey Plaza and Jeff Baena were not only a couple but also frequent creative collaborators. They worked together on several projects, including the 2014 film Life After Beth and the 2022 movie Spin Me Round. Baena was a respected filmmaker who also co-wrote the critically acclaimed film I Heart Huckabees. Their partnership was a cornerstone of both their professional and personal lives, a bond that makes her loss even more profound.

As she continues to work and move forward, Plaza’s willingness to share her journey is a powerful reminder of the importance of honesty and open conversation about mental health and grief. While the road ahead is long, her strength in navigating this “daily struggle” is an inspiration to many.